siony boy

A boy she’s not! But she loves it when people call her “Siony Boy.”

By day, she’s as enterprising as she gets, peddling anything from fish to firewood to charcoal to fruits. By night, she’s as entertaining as she gets, singing anything from “Bed of Roses” to “Nakaka” to “Hanggang” to “Dancing Queen.”

In her late 40s, Siony Boy is Tago’s resident stand-up comedienne, a buffoon who cracks her punch line in crisp broken English.

Born Asuncion Martinez Tajonera, Siony Boy has been put through the wringer many times that she now looks at life’s misfortune as nothing but a cliché. And this is how she survives. With much fewer regrets, if ever.

All over Tago, Siony Boy is known to be multi-skilled, a trait she exploits to fend for herself, her aging mother and her daughter.

Back in 1998, Siony Boy was a June bride in Boracay!

In blinding white organza gown, Siony Boy walked down the aisle looking like she was ready to roll on the floor laughing. But the ceremony ended without Siony Boy pulling any trick like stripping down not to her black lace drawers but white cotton skivvies.

For Angel Alejandro, Siony Boy’s groom, it was literally a dream wedding. Many times after his father died, he had shown up in Angel’s sleep, asking him why he hadn’t asked for Siony Boy’s hand yet. Angel finally gave in when in one dream, he saw his father sitting on his grave with his back toward him, sobbing.

Siony Boy’s father-in-law was her valued customer in Boracay during the 90s. That time, she worked as collection officer of her brother who was into selling Footstep products. The old man must’ve been beguiled by Siony Boy’s easy ways and jolly personality, not to mention her bag of antics and mastery of carabao-English, that he told her that if he were single, he would marry her. But because he was not, he did the next best thing: paired-off Siony Boy with his son.

If she was attracted to Angel, Siony Boy wouldn't say. What she said was that Angel was a quiet man who owned three carabaos and worked as casual employee in Caticlan.

Angel never courted her, she would say; it was Angel’s father who courted him for her, she would add jokingly.

Angel domesticated Siony Boy who, in 1999, gave birth to a beautiful angel she named, well, Angel.

When Siony Boy was about ready to resume work, her brother’s business suffered an irreversible setback. Not used to being house-bound, she asked Angel that she be allowed to go to Manila with Angel. In Manila where most of her relatives lived, she told Angel, she was sure to find work and be fine. Angel approved, but Siony Boy's policeman brother did not. He sent her money for fare in going home to Tago.

Siony Boy says she hasn’t heard much from Angel. She just leaves it to Angel to exchange text messages with her father. Angel never sends Angel money but Siony Boy doesn’t cry over this because she knows that angels abound. In America. In Australia. Even in places she doesn’t dream of.

In March 2011 at Tago gym, Siony Boy mounted the stage to pin ribbons on Angel who finished elementary as class valedictorian. Being a local celebrity that she is, Siony Boy was met with thunderous applause. As Angel bowed in gratitude, her face beamed with pride for having a “dual-Sim” for a mother.

And that, definitely, is no cliché!