what-ifs and if-onlys

Except for the 1977 fire that reduced to ashes a mother and her three children, nothing could be more tragic for Tago than the vehicular accident that killed Bingbing, Tito Jun, and ‘Ya Tet in one fell swoop.

Tito Jun was driving; Papong sat beside him in front. Behind them were ‘Ya Tet, Tingay, and Bingbing. As the Crosswind sped on a highway in Bunawan, an old man, dragging a bicycle by his side, crossed the street. The white SUV grated concrete, swerved, and turned turtle eight times, leaving in its wake sparks, tires, and cadavers.

Everything happened in split second. And because death is a smooth operator with impeccable precision and timing, Tagon-ons pitched a lot of what-ifs and if-onlys.

Two eulogists said that what if 'Ya Tet decided to spend her birthday in Tago instead of Davao?; what if Bingbing had denied ‘Ya Tet’s request to accompany her?; what if Bingbing didn’t go home from Dubai?; what if Bingbing had overslept that day, even for a few minutes?; what if they had given in to Bingbing’s request for either pancit or spaghetti the night before, would it make her life longer?

A blogger ruminated that what if either Bingbing or ‘Ya Tet drank so much water before leaving that day, would they request Tito Jun to pull over so they could use the toilet?

Tagon-ons asked what if ‘Ya Tet sat in front, would she advise Tito Jun to slow down?; what if Papong had pursued his original plan to go to Davao with his motorcycle, would ‘Ya Tet sit in front?; what if Tita Siony decided to join ‘Ya Tet even if ‘Ya Tet told her that the house in Davao had no refrigerator in which Tita Siony could store her medicines, would it change the seating position? Or, would she request Tito Jun to pull over because being a diabetic, she needed to take a leak every so often?; what if Tito Jun gassed-up for a half rather than a full tank?

Not a few Tagon-ons mulled over some if-onlys, like: if only ‘Ya Tet pursued her plan of commuting with Bingbing to Davao; if only Tito Jun didn’t race against another vehicle; if only ‘Ya Tet or Bingbing opted to sit in the middle instead of Tingay.

Ahhh! So many what-ifs and if-onlys!

But death doesn’t happen by chance, neither it is random. Just think of W. Somerset Maugham’s “The Appointment in Samarra” and the story of a man who avoided a ship like a cliché because a psychic told him that a marine vessel would cause his death, only to die when an earthquake made a huge painting of a storm-tossed yacht to fall on his head

Despite what the Bible says about its inevitability, death, in all its forms, is hard to accept. Thus we dwell on the what-ifs and the if-onlys even as we begin the excruciating process of coping. But amidst this flood of what-ifs and if-onlys that inundated Tago on the tragic death of Bingbing, Tito Jun, and ‘Ya Tet, one interesting detail sailed through: Papong, while riding shotgun, came out of the crash unscathed!

There’s a lesson there about death that begs to be learned!